Thursday, 9 July 2009

Dark Ages

it finally came to pass. the Dark Ages are upon me.

for so it was, the loss of my final refuge to the relentless, steam powered claw, of an evolutionary backwards IT policy tightening its grip about the throat of the 21st century.




It was Thursday. So I was in Iide, tucked away in the hills, a mere note on a sign to most, as they whizz through on their journey to far off lands, in Oguni or Niigata.

Kyoto-sensei took me aside to the meeting room this morning for a chat. I almost defecated myself, such was my sureness that my lax time keeping would finally be punished.
Alas, it was not to be. Instead, with an almost apologetic tone, Kyoto-sensei informed me of a much more illogical command from on high was passed down, echoing an earlier crushing defeat for 21st century progress and sense at Nagai Koko.

Yes, the network was to be purified. This purge, this Inquisition of all free thinking and unique computers, is being overseen by the Inquisitor, whose mysterious background and persona we have no idea about, sealed away as he is from the rest of the world, communicating only in increasingly arcance edicts that aim to prune back our 21st century excess and free spirited communicating.

Even now, he looks at a map of his feidom, eyeing up pockets of 21st century abandon and enjoyment. Biding his time until they too fall under the might of the hanko'd law. He's twisted the King's ear. And when his plan has covered the whole ken he will dispose of this pawn and take up total control for himself. For the purified network is only the beginning. A stepping stone, a footnote, to his grander plan to instill in everyone his ravaging strive for social purity through self inflicted frustration, confusion and hardship.

Truly, a prefecture, maybe even a world, that we must all fight in whatever way we can.


I cannot connect my laptop to the Sacred Network of the Cleansed. Not that i'd want to. The nourishing thought of belonging to a common good, under the watchful eye of the Inquisitor, has instilled... unclean practices in these faithful. Just as we watch the devastating effect of false information spread by churches, imams and synagogues in the real world, we watch as computers abandon common sense anti virus because the Network will protect them. A noisesome fact made more shocking by the deafening silence of opposition.

Moreover, a new practice has come to my attention. As the faithful grow in number, the Inquisitor tries new ways to expand his power. Gone are the heady days of USB memory sticks. Accused of carrying sickness and disease whereever they go, there is a witchhunt for them. My networkless computer sits with worksheets ready to be printed. A single computer is ready for my use, but alas, I cannot copy my scrolls of English guidance to them via my own memory stick.
No my brothers and sisters of the Resistance. I must go to Kyoto-sensei, persuade him of my need for the magic of mobile storage, receive unto my care a sacrd Encrypted memory stick, and copy my scrolls of English onto it. On the sole computer set aside for my networked benefit, I can load it there and then go about my business.

If only words escaped me as to this.... unevolved state of affairs. As it is, I find comfort in the words of many fellow free spirited thinkers and computer lovers of the 21st century when I ponder these Dark Times:

"What the fuck?!"

Wednesday, 1 July 2009

Guess Who

He is a boy, with absolutely *no* respect for anyone, or any culture. None at all. Their objections or taboos. And he believes in "friends" only as people who can help him get something.



Have a guesss...

Wording provided by Evil Davide (TM), my new persona going into the 3rd year.

I've been cheerful JoeyD now for 2 years. It feels like it's time for a change. You know, like when you want to change the curtains, or carpet. Out with the old, in with the new... lol

And, honestly, it's just way more fun this way.



What's prompted it are the usual heady mix of people that mill around and grate on nerves over time. In particular, i'm disappointed with someone who's planning something that i don't think *anyone* would advise them is a wise decision.

Indeed, given the place we all live and work, and it's associated norms and expectations (or worse, their prejudices towards us gaijin) it takes a particularly selfish and disrespectful person to manage to score an own goal in such a spectacular fashion that this person is hell bent on doing.



It makes me sad. Cos it'll affect how other gaijin will be seen I'm sure. And it may even hasten the speed with which certain places of business no longer use the serrvices of the magnificent program that we are all on...

But this won't matter to the person in question. Because now they've got what they want. Unwarranted and unearned power and "authority"...



Thankfully Evil Davide isn't fully awakened, or I'd want to destroy this person. lol. No, JoeyD is still alive and kicking, Hurrahs!

Saturday, 23 May 2009

Locked and Loaded

Came home and locked my bike.



A normal statement of intent/fact, but coming from me, Arab Man who leaves everything he owns unlocked and in the public domain, it was a stunning turn around. LOL

So now my bike is locked and loaded against frogman bum germs and any unannounced "borrowings".

Hurrahs!!! + WIN for me.

Speed karaoke... speed demons

Speed Karaoke for the win!!

Except when I'm singing a song that, actually you know, I kinda quite like slow....

But if someone else wants me to hurry up...

... cos it's not a song they like...

... and it's not an 80's song...

... which BTW should be the anthem of ALTs in Japan, lol


Oh fuck! I forgot to try any Bon Jovi. I know about 2 of their songs. Also U2. In normal circumstances I steer clear of both of these artists music, but in karaoke it's good.

And even when it's not, hey to each their own... and not the +7 tempo button...

Friday, 22 May 2009

Bike Update

All is rosy...

Well.. as rosy as it can be when my terms are agreed to but I find out that my bike was being used by a couch surfer of the person. He was out riding around Nagai on it.

I think I saw him actually, while at the coin laundary. I was coming out and saw some bearded dude riding down the road, but I was in the car and way ahead of him so I couldn't stop to say hey.

Small world! LOL

(Oh but yeah... lending my bike to complete stranger.... un-LOL )

bike mystery solved

the main suspect was indeed the person responsible for taking my bike

Not borrowing - taking.

No request, or note or email. She had all day to inform me of it

I remind you of the fact this person isn't a close friend anymore...

So I sent off an email that I feel was very reasonable, especially given my past emails when I'm in this angry state.



One weird thing; with this person, I still find myself getting very angry internally. It's because I am so angry at myself for being so impotent and polite in my situation



here's a copy of the email. Also sent part of it to other people in Nagai who've used my bike in the past.


well could you bring it back please? ASAP

why are you using my bike when your bike is perfectly usable? If your bike is broken, why didn't you ask or leave a note?

i know I've said i'm fine with people using it, but only after they've asked me about it.

i don't expect to come home and find my property gone, with no request first.

The way people use my bike has got to change.

from now on if anyone wants to use my bike - permission needs to be asked or a note left

i'm very happy for my bike to be used by *anyone* if these very simple requests can be met.

JoeyD

Yellow Futons and Cookie Jars

Yay for coin laundaries!

Today is the final part of my OCD plan to wash everything in my apartment. Summer wardrobe is all ready, now it's just the futon and sheets.

The futon is ridiculously yellow. It's always been like that, but it's not like it could get much worse. So despite being washed it's now being given a spin in the tumble dryer and looks a weird shade of yellow. Peeps will probably be like WTF when they see it.



Okay, on another note. If you hadn't come to an activity that requires lots of practice all year (well, since it started in April) and didn't really come in winter when it ended... and with upcoming performances coming up riding on your performance which hasn't been very good frankly.... would you insist on coming back?



On a similar note. It's getting slightly ridiculous. I allowed my bike to be used by Kelly for her friends to ride around Nagai on. I forgot this because, like the bike itself, I rarely use it.

Still it is my property; just like my car - locked or unlocked. And it's registered with the police even (not something I wanted to do but necessary in Japan), just like my car.

So when I found it gone today... with no word or asking, and probably no word of thanks....

Yeah, I'm locking the damn thing and chewing out whoever fucking took it. I give peeps permission once, not a carte blanche.

Fuck sake. Some people. So stupid and/or childish. An email or somethiing would be fine. Not just turning up and finding it gone altogether... and esepcially, potentially, by someone who I don't even consider a close friend anymore...

Who knows what'll happen when caught with their hand in the cookie jar...

Wednesday, 20 May 2009

Bored in May

1 hour to go. So bored! No work at all!! It's actually making me want to do some prep for Okino tomorrow! That's right, it's *that* bad. lol

Had a cheering ceremony. Cheer sports peeps. Same old same old. Same awesome rafter raising cheering. Same shock at the short shorts that the track and field boys wear - And they sit cross legged too. Not a pretty sight... to the right.

Now because I'm next to the printer it gives teachers an awesome chance to either a) talk to me, or b) stare at my computer and then at me, and then walk away.

Well, B) seems to be winning the... er.. well if there was a race, with horses, B would be winning. Which is okay, except I now know that the person with *the* most annoying print jobs are Comb-Over Sensei.

The man is singlehandedly responsible for the "once" in that line in textbooks about how "Europe and parts of America were once covered in forests". He will also forget, everytime, to send all his documents through. When he realises this, between staring at me and killing trees, he makes this noise. Kind of like a gulp... but... like... external. It's weird and biologically impossible.

Oh wow! Here we go! ! As I type this the printer is whizzing into life! Shit. What about the health implications?! All that Ozone gas?! Maybe that's what helped push my cholesterol a little higher; now at 287 and climbing. If only the economy could follow my blood's epic example.

45 more minutes to go. Hurrahs!




I haven't had a full week of work since going on holiday to Singapore and Hong Kong. Seriously. They've all either been broken up with holidays, Golden Weeks or days at Okino.

Even when I've had a supposedly full week, school's been in a lull cos of tests, so there's actually nothing to do once inside the buil-, I mean Tomb Of JoeyD, for 9 hours of the day. A highlihgt recently was getting thing ready to use in the Epic Rescue of Kelly's Laptop. The movie rights of which have been sold and I'm awaiting A-listers for consideration to play "Me" in the film.



Talking of which have to back and sort out a microphone issue. And sign some drivers. 30 minutes to go!!! Hurrahs!!!